Day of Reckoning
by Waffle of Doom
Summary: After 'the incident' involving Jasper, in the lunch room, naked; Jasper, with the help of Edward, has decided to get revenge against Emmett for the role he played in it. SEQUEL TO SHOWER STORIES.
1. Fine, Partners

**A/N  
(To the tune of The Real Slim Shady)  
Guess who's back, back again; Waffle's back, tell a friend!**

**Okay guys, you requested it so here it is, the first chapter to my first ever sequel! Sorry it took so long for me to write it, after I read Breaking Dawn I needed some time to sit back and process what had just happened to our beloved vampires and werewolves (ahem shape shifters now). I actually wasn't even sure if I was even going to continue writing fanfiction after I read it because I felt sort of thrown through a loop and didn't know how I felt about what had occurred in BD. But now I know and have decided that I like BD, even though it didn't quite meet my expectations.**

**Anyways, enough of my rambling, here's the story!**

**Disclaimer- I asked SM if I could own Twilight, she said no.**

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JPOV

I was sitting at my desk in a slight stupor, thinking back on the recent series of events that had unfolded since the 'incident' had occured.

Since Edward and Emmett had now finished their community service, and I my detentions, things had calmed down around the Cullen household, at least on the surface. You see, below the surface I am still seething because I still have not, as of yet, enacted my revenge against Emmett for the role he played in the 'incident'.

And according to Edward, seeing as he and I are back on_ somewhat_ good terms, Emmett thinks I have forgotten completely about what he helped do to me; But one thing about a vampire is that they never forget, I have just not decided what torture is fitting enough for my dear oaf of a brother.

That is going to change soon though, very soon. His day of reckoning is near.

So there I sat, not only thinking now, but plotting when suddenly, I was pulled out of my stupor by a sound near the door.

"Why hello Jasper, what's this I hear about you planning to torture Emmett?" Edward asked as he sauntered into Alice and my bedroom where I had been plotting.

"What?" I questioned, feigning innocence, "where did you hear that?"

He reached up and tapped his temple with a knowing smirk.

"Ah, that," I said, dropping my act, "How bout you stay out of my head for a while, okay? The last thing I need is for you to go skipping off to Emmett to rat me out."

"First, let's get a few things straight," Edward replied in an amused tone, "One, I don't skip and two, I'm assuming you are going to be needing some help and I am here to offer you my services."

"Uh-huh," I said skeptically, "and why should I believe you are going to help me, after all, it was you who caused the 'incident'" I made quotation marks in the air as I said this, "before. Truly I should also be plotting revenge against you more than Emmett."

"Yes, that is true, you should and you could, but you're not and to express my gratitude, I would like to help you, because there is no way you will be able to bring him down alone. So what do you say, partners?" Edward asked while holding out his hand like he was waiting for me to shake it.

As he was saying all this it slowly started to sink in that he was right, and I was going to need help. So, grudgingly, I stood and shook his hand.

"Fine. Partners."

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**A/N Woo-hoo! Edward and Jasper have teamed up to become the ultimate threat! This shall be interesting, especially since I have absolutely NO IDEA what-so-ever as to what they are going to do to Emmett, it's going to be just as much a surprise to me as it will be to you! (If anybody wants to make any suggestions I'm all ears hint-hint)**

**Also, if you are reading this chapter for the second time you may notice some changes, when I went back to read it I wasn't happy and decided to revise it a bit.**

**REVIEW or else the walrus, panda, and BOTH monkeys will team up to become the ultimate threat!**


	2. VERY IMPORTANT! MUST READ!

**Sorry guys, this is just an A/N.**

First off, I want to thank everybody who has sent me an idea, if I haven't done so already. I don't think any will be in this story (well this one really great idea may be, I'm not sure yet), but I am going to use a few of them for stories themselves.

Secondly, I just thought I should let you all know that it may be a couple of weeks until I can update again. I'm starting a new school on Monday and from then on I will be extremely busy, so, for now, Day of Reckoning is on a very _very_ **TEMPORARY HIATIUS**. I will continue it, but it will be a little while.

Sorry again and wish me luck at my new school, and that this girl that REALLY hates me (it's a mutual feeling), that goes to this school, hasn't learned to throw a punch, LOL.

Sincerely,  
Waffle of Doom

**OH! Also on a completly unrelated note, does anybody have a picture of _Nick Jonas's green Converse_? My friend's B-Day is coming up and she LOVES Nick, so I wanted to get the exact same green Converse he has for her, but I'm not 100percent on the shade. Please PLEASE _PLEASE _let me know if you do. Thanks!**


	3. Hit Him Where It Hurts

**A/N I'M BAAAACK! Did ya miss me?**

**So, hiatus is over, I'm going to be continuing with Day of Reckoning now, so you can all do a little happy dance. You see, I was getting depressed because it seems like everyone is on hiatus, or just not updating. My favorite story (James and Bella) hasn't been updated for a while, and I miss it and then everyone else is like that, too, so I was sad.**

**Now, I would like to thank everybody who wished me good luck at my new school, but it would appear all the good luck in the world didn't help. I'm now back at my old school, which has the stupidest dress code EVER! All t-shirts have to be crew neck, and nothing can have any patterns except for stripes and plaid, bleah.**

**Also, the first day I was back at my old school, I went to a Tokio Hotel concert, which rocked. Tom is totally the cuter twin, IMO.  
That's all, enjoy.**

**Disclaimer All I own is a copy of Twilight.**

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JPOV

"So," Edward said as he took a seat on the foot of my bed across from me, "now that we're partners how about you share your ideas with me?"

"Well, I _was_ going to try to get Rosalie in on it, you know get her to withhold something very valuable to Emmett," I replied.

"Mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm," Edward nodded knowingly, "well as great as that is, it will never work because Rose will _never _help. So in saying that, let's move on to ideas that aren't completely stupid and half-baked, shall we?"

"Okay, fine." I hissed through my clenched teeth, "What do you have in mind?"

Edward stood and started to slowly pace the length of the room with his hands clasped behind his back. "I was thinking that since we can't hit him where it will hurt him the most, we'll just have to hit him in his second most sensitive spot."

"And what would that be?" I asked haughtily.

"Jasper, how long have you known Emmett? Just think what are his three favorite things, and which of those things can we harm?"

"Three favorite? Hmm, that would have to be Rose, grizzly bears, and his jeep."

As soon as I said the word jeep Edward's mouth turned up into a devilish grin and he started to nod slowly.

"Hi-his _jeep_?" I stammered.

Edward continued to nod slowly and I threw my hands in the air exasperatedly.

"Oh you're _right_,Edward! _That _plan isn't stupid or half-baked at ALL!" I said in a mocking tone, "It isn't like there's any chance of him _murdering _us for harming his jeep, it's not like he loves that car like his child!"

"Jasper, Jasper, Jasper, poor, sweet, naïve, Jasper." Edward said condescendingly, as he laid his hand on my shoulder. "I didn't say we were going to harm the jeep, just make a few minor improvements."

"Oh really? Like what?"

"Well, let's start with the color. Red is so over done, I was thinking a nice coat of pink paint, maybe a few sparkles, would really make it stand out more."

Edward's idea was slowly starting to grow on me, "Pink you say? Hot pink or more of a powder-puff?"

"What the heck, we could do both. Make the body hot pink and the guard rails, bumper and such a powder-puff."

"Hmm," I stroked my chin with my fingers, "I like it, please, continue."

"Well we could also…"

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**A/N Oh snap! Cliffy!**

**Review! Or else my new puppy, Charlie (I wanted to name him Jacob, but noooo), will unleash his fury upon you!  
I'm warning you, he's 10lbs of pure piddle!**

**Also, new poll, go VOTE! I'll be inclined to update sooner if you do!**

**ONE MORE THING! You MUST listen to Let It Rock by Kevin Rudolf, it's rockin!**


	4. BRB GRL

**A/N Sorry the update took so long guys, I was going to do it yesterday, but I went to a Santana concert (yes, I know kinda lame) and didn't get home til after 11:30pm.**

**On a happy note I got my new contacts in today, they're honey colored and on me they look amber. A girl actually told me today that I looked like a vampire (I have really pale skin and dark hair) and I was like, "OMG! Best complement EVER!" and then after that my day took a turn for the worse because my shoe's high heel broke when I was wearing them, and they were my favorite high heels.**

**Also, I forgot to thank everybody who helped me find the right color green Converse. I managed to find them (after going to 5 stores) at the last minute in her size, and they were so awesome I got a pair, too.**

**One last random thing, I went to a baseball game on Monday night and I was sitting right behind the away teams dugout (my fav place because I can ogle all the hot players) and there was a really hot one who kept looking up at me and smiling, and he looked just like Peter Facinelli, except younger and hotter, I kid you not. I was having fun with it too, until my mom said really loudly just to be funny, "Does he realize that you're JAIL BAIT?" (meaning I'm a minor), I totally could have killed her.**

**Disclaimer- I don't own Twilight. That is all.**

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**JPOV**

(The Next Day at School)

"Do you have everything?" Edward asked me.

We were standing in the school parking lot beside Emmett's jeep, about one hour before school would be out, preparing to Barbie-afiy Emmett's o-so-manly jeep.

"Let's see…" I responded and began to pull the supplies out of the bag, "I have a gallon each of hot pink a powder pink paint, two paint brushes, pink faux-fur seat covers, sparkles, pink velour for the interior, some cute little stuffed animals… OH! And the piece-DE-resistance," I held up a cd that I had burned the previous night.

Edward took the disc out of my hand and examined it, "And you can wire the stereo so it plays continuously, correct?" He questioned.

"Of course I can, I know more about electronics than this schools entire AV squad put together!" I said indignantly.

"Fine, I was just checking. I'll get started paint and you start hotwiring that stereo. Oh, can you make it so he can't turn the sound down, or turn it off?"

"Yeah, sure. Now hand me those pliers."

And with that we got to work.

**… … … … … … … … … … … … … … …**

**About 30 minutes later…**

"There! All finished!" Edward declared as he placed the last stuffed animal, a purple bunny, on the back seat.

We both stepped back to admire our work, which was quite fantastic, if I do say so myself.

The entire car was various shades of pink, not even a single, tiny, insignificant screw was left unaltered. Everything from the tires to the antenna was pink, the antenna being topped off by a little stuffed grizzly bear. Emmett is going to freak when school gets out and he spots his precious jeep.

"You know," Edward began, "I still think it's missing _something._"

"Like?"

"This," Edward answered, pulling out a license plate from behind his back and holding it up for me to see.

"BRB GRL?" I asked as he moved to screw the plate into place on the jeeps rear bumper.

"Mmm-hmm. Remember that pink convertible Rosalie had oh, 10 or so years ago? Well she kept the personalized license plate she had on it after she got rid of the car, I found it in the garage last night and thought it would just be like the cherry on top of our wonderful scheming sundae," Edward explained.

"Ah." I nodded in understanding, "You know what this is beginning to remind me of?"

"No. What's that?"

"A motivational poster I saw once, you know the 'courage' one."

"Ah, yes. I guess that would be appropriate in this situation." Edward agreed.

Then both our heads snapped up from looking at the plate, towards the school. The bell had rang and Emmett was coming.

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**A/N Link to the motivational poster is in my profile, you gotta see it. Also, poll results are up, too.**

**Now REVIEW! Or else a seagull will steal your underpants!**


	5. You Think We Should Warn Them?

**A/N Sorry for the wait, I know I said I'd have a new chapter up yesterday.**

**I have some exciting news (for me at least) my mom works with a girl who is a designer and my mother asked her if she could make me a purple trench coat that is based of the Joker's coat from The Dark Knight, and she said YES! I was almost doing cartwheels I was so excited!**

**I want to dedicate this chapter to UrEveryDayDork. for just being awesome! **

**Disclaimer- I don't own Twilight, New Moon, or Eclipse, and I DEFINITELY don't own Breaking Dawn, no way would I ever take credit for that.**

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EmPOV

"RINNNNNNNGGGGG!"

Finally! School's out! I can't wait to get home; I'm so close to beating Jasper's high score on Halo 3. I would have beaten it last night, but _nooo_, Jasper was being a big baby and messing with my emotions the whole time I was playing. Actually, now that I think of it he was probably up to something.

Ah well, whatever it is it can't be too bad. It's Jasper after all, he'd never be able to pull one over on me.

I strolled down the school hallway to my locker to retrieve my books, which were required for tonight's homework, from my locker, not that I really need them.

As I shut my locker door I heard laughter coming from the school parking lot, a lot of laughter that was just growing in amount.

I pushed open the double doors at the end of the hallway that led to the parking lot and looked over towards where it seemed everybody was congregating. Then I saw it.

My Jeep.

I'm going to kill Jasper.

I began to push my way through the crowd to where it was parked and saw the extent of the damage. It wasn't just the outside that had been altered; it was the inside, too. _Everything_ was pink and _fluffy_.

"JASSSSSPER!" I roared as loud as possible, for all I knew he could be in Alaska by now, but it didn't matter, he would hear me, and he would know just how much pain he was going to be in, "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" And then the humans started to move away from me; some quite slowly, as if I was an animal that would attack at any sudden movement, and others very swiftly, like I was going to kill them just for being too near.

Rosalie appeared by my side, followed closely by Alice and a very reluctant Bella.

"What the heck happened to the Jeep?!" Rose demanded angrily.

"HER-" I jabbed my finger Alice's direction, "husband, that's what!"

"Oh, nonsense, Emmett," Alice chirped happily, "Jasper would never do that," she gestured to my very pink Jeep, "by himself."

"Of course he would never do it by _himself_," Rosalie sneered, obviously upset that she was going to have to completely overhaul the Jeep, "but has anyone seen our _dear_Edward? Hmmm?"

"WHAT?" Bella questioned her indignantly, "Edward would _never_ do anything as mean as-"

Alice cut her off, "Last month, Bella." She reminded her.

Her face fell as she began to remember, "Oh yeah, I was trying to forget about that. Never mind."

"Okay, where are Jasper and Edward then, _Alice_?" I asked.

"They _may_ be at the house, but I'm not 100 percent sure, the Volvo's still here."

"Well, I'm not waiting around for them to show up, I'm going to go find them," I said as I flung open the driver's side door, just to be bombarded with the overwhelming scent of cheap flower perfume that was so strong even Bella could smell it.

"Oh my God, Emmett! Close the door, that stuff stinks!" she coughed as she held her nose.

"How am I supposed to get that horrible smell out of there!" Rose shrieked, "Paint and upholstery is one thing, but that unholy stench is a whole other realm!"

I growled as I climbed in and slammed the door. When I turned the key in the ignition I was rewarded with another surprise, two other surprises, actually.

The first one being thousands of tiny sparkles blowing out of the air vents and all over the car's interior, and the second being an extremely annoying and obnoxious song blaring out of my stereo.

Crap, I fumbled with the stereo controls trying to turn it off, or at least down, all while it was blasting in my ears and shaking the car.

**"I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic  
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation"**

Dammit! I couldn't get it to do anything; it appeared that either Edward or Jasper had cut the wires to the sound controls.

I could hear Alice giggling outside, and could tell Bella was stifling a laugh as well.

"Forget this," I thought angrily, as I slammed the car into reverse and peeled out of the parking lot. "Now they are really in trouble."

APOV

"You think we should call and warn them about how mad he is?" Bella asked me hesitantly as soon as Emmett's jeep was out of sight.

"Nah," I answered her confidently, "They knew what they were doing. Besides, they're big boys, they can take care of themselves. Now come on, I want to get to the house before the fun starts."

"Fun?" Bella and Rosalie echoed.

"Trust me," was all I said.

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**A/N Well, there you have it, Emmett is going to kill Jasper and Edward, let's watch, shall we?  
BTW, link to song in my profile.**

**REVIEW! Or else Jasper and Edward will pin their prank on you, and then you'll have to incur the wraith of Emmett!**


	6. You Got That Right

**A/N Hey, hey, hey! I've got a new chapter for your reading pleasure! BUT FIRST! I have a CHALLENGE for you!**

**Here are the rules and information:  
1. It must be of the humor genre.  
2. There is NO preset**** topic that it has to be based on, but it must be Twilight. Write _anything_, as long as it will make people laugh.  
****3. It can only be a oneshot.  
4. It may NOT be rated M.****  
5. It must be YOURS. No taking somebody's story and trying to pass it off as yours.  
6. No major grammar mistakes and no excessive net speak (for example, a few LOL's and OMG's are okay)  
7. You must submit it through a PM to me by Friday, October 17 before midnight. I will notify you when I receive it, if you don't get a PM back from me, please assume I didn't receive it and resend it.  
8. I along with ONE reader will be judging these and picking a winner. If you are interested in being that other judge, let me know, I will pick one person. _(I am no longer accepting offers for judges.)  
_9. The winner will be announced Sunday, October 19.  
10. Have fun! :)**

**Disclaimer- Don't know why I still put these in, everyone knows I don't own Twilight.**

**

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****JPOV**

Back at the house Edward and I had sat down in front of Emmett's beloved flat screen and started to play HALO, whilst we laughed at the thought of Emmett discovering his dear Jeep. We figured it would be best if we weren't in arms reach when he discovered his 'surprise'. Besides we had mounted a camera in a tree by the corner of the parking lot; this way we will be able to watch the action, and still be a safe distance away.

"HAHA! TAKE THAT! AND TH-" I hit pause on the game and my head snapped up in the direction of the front yard, where there was the distinct noise of a car barreling down the driveway accompanied by the sound of Barbie Girl blasting out of the stereo, "Do you hear that?"

"Of course I do, now un-pause the game, I was just about to kill you," Edward answered, irritated.

"What?!" I all but shouted in disbelief, "Don't you realize who that is?! Emmett's coming to kill us!"

Edward rolled his eyes at me and set down the game controller he was holding, "Great observation, Captain Obvious." Edward said extremely sarcastically, "Of course its Emmett, who else would it be? And are you forgetting, I can hear his thoughts, which at the moment aren't very coherent, but the gist of them are that he's planning on tearing the both of us limb from limb."

"Well that's just great, Edward!" I shouted at him, while simultaneously standing up and throwing my hands in the air, "I beginning to think that this wasn't such a good plan."

"Jasper, Jasper, Jasper," he answered exasperatedly, and stood to put his arm around my shoulders in reassurance, "It was my plan, therefore, it was great plan."

"Are you not worried? Emmett's freaking HUGE and he's mad, not a good combination for us."

"Well Jasper, you're the one who feels emotions, do I feel worried to _you_?" Edward asked confidently.

I tested the emotional waters in the room, "No, as a matter of fact you feel cocky, notably so."

A wide, crooked, sinister smile spread across his face, "Exactly. You see it's not like he will be able to actually harm us if it comes down to a fight, specifically because with your experience and my extra talent, we would be the obvious winners. So no worries, my dearest brother."

He clapped me on the back, "Now, enough talk, Emmett just pulled up."

"Fine, whatever, but I still think he's going to kill us." I replied

"Whatever you say, Jasper, whatever you say," Edward replied condescendingly.

From in front of the house I heard the echo of a car door slam violently, then a crash as it broke off and fell to the ground, followed by Emmett's deep voice swearing furiously.

He then stormed up porch stairs and flung open the front door, and I whispered to Edward quietly enough that I didn't think Emmett would be able to hear me, "We're dead."

Emmett stood in the doorway, "You got that right," he growled.

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**A/N This should prove interesting...**

**Now REVIEW, or else the monkeys will kidnap you and force feed you Kibbles n' Bits!**

**DON'T FORGET TO SUBMIT A STORY FOR THE CHALLENGE! WRITE ANYTHING, JUST MAKE ME LAUGH!**


	7. HEY! LOOK OVER HERE!

**Sorry guys, not a chapter!**

**I just wanted to let you know the challenge is being extended until November 2nd, due to me only getting 3 stories submitted (come on guys, you can do better then that!) although that might be my bad because I noticed that my PM's were turned off for some reason and I'm not sure how long it was like that...**

**Also, if you submitted yourself to be a judge, I'm sorry I never got back to any of you, but I have not picked somebody yet. If you originally submitted yourself and still want to do it let me know first two people get it. (ONLY IF YOU ARE ONE OF THE ORIGINAL PEOPLE WHO SUBMITTED THEMSELVES)**

**New chapter should be up by Wednesday, but no guarantees.**

**Lots of love, your crazy and unbalanced fanfic writer,  
****Waffle of Doom**

**(P.S. If your looking for some Waffle humor while you wait, take a look at my profile in the 'Snippets of My Daily Life' section, lots of my sarcasm and stupidity is displayed there.)**


	8. Let the Games Begin

**A/N LOOK! UP IN THE SKY IT'S A BIRD! IT'S A PLANE! WAIT, NO! HOLY CRAP! IT'S THE WAFFLE OF DOOM!  
Could've sworn she was dead, after all she hasn't updated in forever, so much for a "very temporary hiatus."  
*Waffle smacks person above her* SHUT UP! Sarcasm is NOT appreciated. Gosh.**

**Sorry about the wait, I know, I suck. You guys are awesome, however (that is those of you who still care enough to read this). Anyways I could make excuses like: I was busy learning to drive (which I was), trying to find a job (again, I was), and school has been kicking my butt (which it has), but I won't because all of those are lame excuses that mean nothing. I could've made time to update, but I didn't, and I apologize.  
*hangs head in shame*  
Feel free to throw tomatoes at me, I deserve it.**

**Disclaimer- Like I really own Twilight. That's about as likely as me being the Queen of Bulgaria.**

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JPOV

_I whispered to Edward quietly enough that I didn't think Emmett would be able to hear me, "We're dead."_

_Emmett stood in the doorway, "You got that right," he growled._

Emmett took a step towards up menacingly a said in a tone that could only be described as homicidal, "First, I'm going to rip you both limb from limb, then I'm going to stomp on the pieces," he took another step, "followed by a quick reassembling, and tearing apart a second time, after that I'm going to take all the pieces and chuck them in the fireplace to see if you catch."

Edward smirked, "And how do you plan to do this?"

"With my bare hands," Emmett breathed back.

"If you say so," Edward replied, unconcerned, which apparently only angered Emmett further.

"Why you little…" Emmett rushed towards Edward in a blind rage and Edward quickly stepped to the opposite side of the coffee table, effectively dodging him.

This further infuriated Emmett whose emotions were nothing but pure, undiluted rage at this point. I moved to the side so as to be out of the way of the fight I was sure was about to break out. Then, as if in some kind of trance and not thinking clearly, Emmett picked up the table, raising it over his head as if he was readying himself to hit Edward with it when one of the only people who could put an end to the madness walked in.

"EMMETT MCCARTY CULLEN! PUT THAT TABLE DOWN _RIGHT NOW_! So help me if you break another coffee table," Esme shouted, angrily. "There will be no more fighting in this house, you all are far too destructive." She looked over at me, "And were you just planning on letting them fight? Did you not even think of trying to calm them down?"

I was immediately ashamed, having always hated to upset Esme for any reason. I hung my head solemnly, "I'm sorry, Esme, you're right. I should have tried to stop them, but I was really only thinking that it was better Emmett took out his emotions on Edward rather than me."

I spared a glance over at Edward and Emmett, both were frozen and Emmett still had the table raised over his head.

Esme sighed, "Emmett, please put down the coffee table, it's brand new. Now what are you fighting about in the first place?"

Emmett set down the table and Edward put on his best innocent face, "We weren't fighting, we were just messing around and it got out of hand."

Esme raised her eyebrows, and I didn't even need my gift to tell me she was skeptical.

"Oh bull crap, Edward!" Emmett roared, "You are so full of it!"

"EMMETT! Watch your mouth! I will not tolerate vulgarity," Esme snapped at him, "now what exactly happened and this time I want the truth." She glared pointedly at each of us, all of which now had looks on our faces like children who had just been scolded by their mother.

"They ruined my Jeep," Emmett half muttered, as if he was afraid of another reprimand.

She raised her eyebrows again, "How so?"

"Well they… here it's easier if I just show you," Emmett walked over to the large window overlooking the front of the house where his car was parked and pulled back the curtain.

Esme's eyes widened in shock and then she quickly brought a hand to her mouth, fighting to stifle a laugh.

"Well," she said trying to hide her smirk, "that was quite childish and inappropriate of them to destroy your, "she glanced out the window again, suppressing another laugh, "property that way." Esme turned to Edward and I, "I hope you realize that you will be making this up to Emmett somehow, I also hope that you will all stop with this behavior and try to resist the urge to make each other miserable, as hard as that may be."

"Yes, ma'am," We all replied in unison.

"Good." She turned and walked out of the room, I could feel the amusement coming from her as she left.

Emmett walked up to my side and growled low in my ear so Esme wouldn't hear him in the other room, "And I hope that you both realize that this is far from over. You have no idea what you've gotten yourselves into."

From besides the table Edward answered, "Oh, I think we do," and smirked at him.

Emmett pivoted towards Edward, "Fine then, let the games begin," then he proceeded to leave without another word.

I heard the front door click open just then and Alice danced into the room, closely followed by an apprehensive Bella and a slightly peeved Rosalie.

"So, "Alice chirped, "Did we miss the fireworks?"

I groaned and collapsed on the couch, which in turn collapsed under my sudden weight, "What have I gotten myself into?"

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**A/N I tried to make it longer, it just wasn't happening though. Ah well.**

**REVIEW! Or else your desk chair will collapse under you, impaling you with the metal stick thing upon which it sits.  
(Wow, that was morbid)**

**Also, if you have anything you want the Cullen boys to do to torture each other, please let me know, I'll try to work it in.**


	9. As Far Away From the Fallout

**A/N I'm baaaaack! With a new installment of DOR, bet you're all just pissin' yer britches you're so excited.  
Orrr...not...**

**Eiter way, I'm back, fully decked out in bright purple hair & a brand spankin' new can of insanity!  
WEEEEEEE!**

**And TY to for the idea that inspired this chapter, as well as a few to come.  
*evil grin*  
Keep the suggestions coming people, Carlisle only knows how much I need them.**

**Disclaimer- Nope. Don't own it. Sorry to disappoint you.**

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BPOV

After having spent a few hours at the Cullen house, where the tension in the air between Jasper, Emmett and Edward was palpable, I had requested that Edward drive me home.

"But why, love?" Edward inquired of me with a crooked smile.

"Because," I replied as authoritative as I could while looking at my own personal Greek god, "When the fighting or plotting or whatever may happen between the three of you begins I want to be as far away from the fallout zone as possible. I want absolutely no part in this fight."

Edward's smile widened, "I wouldn't let anything happen to you, you know that. Never would I let any harm befall you," then he reached down and kissed me softly, "I promise." Another smirk.

I began to let my resolve falter, but then stopped and sighed, irritated, "I know you wouldn't let me get hurt, I'd just rather not be here to witness what may happen. After the Jasper incident I don't need anything else scarring my mind for quite some time."

Edward laughed, "Alright then, I'll take you home."

… … … … … … …

Once we had reached my house Edward jumped out of the drivers seat and ran around the front of the Volvo to open my door.

"Are you sure you wouldn't rather stay at my house? Alice could tell Charlie you were having a sleepover with her. I'm sure he wouldn't object," Edward said.

I smiled up at him as I climbed out of the passenger seat, "Yes, I'm sure. As I said before I'd rather not be around for the fallout."

"Okay," he leaned down and pressed his lips to my forehead, "I'll be back later tonight; I have to go hunting for a bit. I promise I won't go too far away and that'll I'll be back before you awake, my angel."

We pulled apart as he began to walk me to my door, "You promise?"

"Of course," he smirked.

… … … … … … …

"Bells… BELLS! The pans smoking!" I heard Charlie shout from the kitchen table, where he had just set down his paper.

"OH!" I started, surprised. "Sorry, Char- Dad. I guess I'm just a little tired, I think I'll go to bed after I eat."

I removed the now blackened chicken breasts from the pan on the stove, put them on two plates, one for me one for Charlie, and carried them over to the table, where I sat down across from him.

"Maybe that's a good idea, Bells. You look beat, something bothering you?"

"What? Oh, no. It's just with it being the end of the year and finals coming up I've been studying extra and I guess that's making me a little tired," I replied.

Charlie looked relieved, probably glad that there wasn't a "girl problem" he had to deal with. "Alright then," Charlie replied, then continued to eat his burned chicken in silence.

Once I had finished eating I stood and moved towards the sink to clean my plate, when Charlie stopped me.

"Leave it," he said, "You do too much, I'll handle clean up tonight. Go get some rest."

"Thanks," I answered and began my shuffle out of the kitchen and up the stairs.

… … … … … … … …

I was nudged awake by a chilly breeze from my open bedroom window. I glanced at my alarm clock standing on my nightstand, which read, "2:14 AM." I sighed and rolled over to my other side.

"Mmm… Edward?" I mumbled sleepily, expecting to hear his angelic voice reply.

"Not even close," a voice replied from the darkness.

I bolted up in bed, shocked, readying myself to scream if need be. The owner of the voiced moved in front of my window, their hulking figure silhouetted in the moonlight. I opened my mouth and sucked in air, preparing to scream, when fast as lightning the figure was beside my bed, ice cold hand clamped over my mouth, stifling my scream.

"Shh! I don't want you to wake up Charlie!" The voice whispered frantically.

Wait… I know that voice…

"EMMETT!" I tried to snap at him through his hand, but all that came out was a muffled, "UMUM!"

"Sorry, Bells, I can't let you go unless you promise not to scream," Emmett said.

I made a "cross my heart" motion over my chest and he released me. I reached over and clicked on my bedside lamp.

"Emmett! What are you doing here!" I whispered tersely.

His face broke out in an impish grin, "Why, I'm kidnapping you, of course."

"What?" I hissed, "I told Edward I didn't want to stay over! I want to be as far away from whatever antics you three get into this weekend as possible."

"Oh, this isn't _for_ Edward. As a matter of fact he'll probably kill me for doing this, but it'll be worth it in the end. See kidnapping _you_ is my revenge on _him_." Emmett's smile widened.

"No," I held up my hands in a "stop" position, "Ohh-ho-ho no, no, no, absolutely not. I am not going to take part in this."

"Well, you see, Bella, dear, sweet, naïve, Bella, I don't need you're permission to kidnap you, although it would make things easier, I am a vampire, after all. Or are you forgetting?" He asked condescendingly. He then stood and made a move as if to grab me.

"Emmett," I attempted to growl, "Touch me and I'll murder you."

"What's that?" Emmett asked, ignoring me, "You say to not listen to a word you say, throw you over my shoulder, and jump out the window?" he shrugged in fake resignation, "Okay then, Bella, whatever you say."

He snatched me up and whipped me over his shoulder as if I were nothing but a pillow, all the while I was protesting, yet still trying to be quite so as to not wake Charlie. I pounded my fists on his shoulder and hissed, "Put me down NOW."

"Nope, sorry, Bells, you told me not to listen to you, remember?" He replied giddily.

Then he jumped out the window.

* * *

**A/N Sooo... Review?**

**If you don't Emmett's pink Jeep will run you over!  
MWA-HA-HA!**


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